Funny Baseball Player Names and Crazy Freak Accidents

 

It's baseball season. So you know what that means. Time to make another thread to compete for the infamous Baldoza line. 

The March Madness brackets will be determined today. In a lame and boring turn of events, some who were last place initially are now the only people who have a chance of winning

Thanks to the typical cheating Houston jerks, now only Florida or UH predictors have a chance of winning all the points. But it's baseball season, so moving on. 

Some of the craziest injuries happen in baseball, and it's not because of playing baseball . 

For example , Sammy Sosa once sneezed so hard he sprained his lower back. 

Dustin May nearly died eating a salad. 

Jose Quintana cut his finger trying to do the dishes, and couldn't pitch because he needed stitches. 

Or so many pitchers who require their hands to be good injure their hand in fits of rage or happiness. 

Anyways, how's everyone's stock portfolio doing?